Reviews in an office are such a pain in the ass. You have to fill out a form reviewing yourself, practically defending your employment. You do all the work for your manager, really.
"What are areas in which you feel you have excelled?"
"What are areas in which you feel you could improve?"
"Where do you see yourself in 6 months?"
"Don't you think there is something more important that you could be doing instead of this questionnaire, like checking Facebook again? Or even Reddit?"
I've worked really hard for 6 months. I did my best every day because of a renewed work ethic...because I'm a professional, dammit. Also, because I was recommended by my old boss. Chef told me when we met, "I've never had a recommendation for a dishwasher before. This is a first." I was not going to disappoint. No way.
This was what Chef told me in regards to "areas of improvement":
Chef: My advice to you would be, never stop learning. Don't let yourself become stagnant or routine.
Me: Avoid complacency.
Chef: Absolutely. You've told me about the path you are on, and you are a pleasure to work with, John. This is a really hard job that you do, and you keep us going. I want to see you continue to grow during your time with us here, and I want to help you in any way I can. And I want to help when your path takes you some place else.
Well, shit. Is there any question I'm in the right place at this point in my life? Way to give me life advice, Chef. Definitely needed to hear that.
Then he said:
"And, you'll be getting a raise."
Okay! Well, looks like that about does it. And I didn't have to fill out any paperwork. Now THAT is a review.
